Right and Wrong

Frank Deford is so right!

The Opening Ceremonies were, as always, a sappy extravaganza that left a too-sweet taste in every mouth, but I took notice when the Italian national anthem was sung a cappella by a mere little nine-year-old girl. It made me think how, at all our major sports events now, such as the Super Bowl, The Star-Spangled Banner is sung by big celebrities who feel an obligation to put their own fancy stamp on it. A rendition, if you will. A production number. It's catching, too. I was at a hockey game the other night when a pretty vocalist sang both The Star-Spangled Banner and O Canada as if she were in a cabaret.


Somehow, I don't think anybody's national anthem needs to be arranged.

What Would Tyler Durden Do??? is so so very wrong.

• Choosing sides between PETA and Paris Hilton is like choosing what color mousetrap I wanna put my penis in.


• if being gay means I get to bang the girl in the pictures below, then mmmrph-mmrrphh-mmrru. Oh, sorry about that. I had a penis in my mouth for a second there while I put my hair in pigtails and tried on some fishnets.


• Austin, Texas has a hot chick every 15 feet, what the hell is McConaughey doing with Penelope Cruz. She even manages to make a Spanish accent un-sexy. Scooby-Doo has a sexier voice than she does. Overall, I'd rather have my nuts in a mountian lions mouth than hers.

But he is fast becoming my very favorite place on the internet.