The Countertop Chronicles

"Run by a gun zealot who's too blinded by the NRA" - Sam Penney of

Saturday, January 14, 2006

The Major Anouncement

The other day at lunch I took a long stroll out and about around town. Stopped off at JR CIgars, picked up a stogie, and headed down the street up to Dupont Circle and then back to my office. I used the time to think about recent events. To reflect on the life I have lived so far. To comes to terms with the truth of my current situation.

After thinking long and hard about it, internally debating for weeks (if not months), and trying to come to grips with all the emotions running through me, I have decided to undertake a major change in my life.

I am coming out of the closet.

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Yep, I believe I might just be starting to become a Redskins fan.

It shouldn't be a surprise really. While I grew up a Yankees, Giants, Rangers fan, I've lived almost as many years outside of the New York/New Jersey area as I lived there. Further, while it didn't really impact me as a kid living in Jersey, my father has not relented in his anger and hatred towards the Giants (and now Jets) over their refusal to rename themselves in light of their real residence - New Jersey. Finally, Eli Manning is an asshole. I don't care if he's good or not, no one should ever forget what a fucking shallow minded selfish asshole he was when first drafted. I'm not a fan of the San Diego Chargers, but I really can't support one of the biggest fucktards in the NFL since Brian Bosworth.

While the Redskins are not without their own shitheads and assholes. The difference, of course, is everyone knows what pieces of crap they are and treats them with the appropriate amount of respect. In addition, while it pains me to get excited when they win (and win they have been doing) just because it might bring joy to that little piece of dictatorial shit, I can't help but have fallen for their scrappy nature, dedicated fans, and redeemed coach.

Plus, my kid really digs them and while they aren't the Giants, they do bring the upside of allowing me to hate the Dallas Cowboys even more. Oh yeah, even better, it ticks off the liberals of PC fucktards.

Hail to the Redskins!
Hail Vic-tor-y!
Braves on the Warpath!
Fight for old Dixie!

Scalp 'em, swamp 'em — We will take 'em big score
Read 'em, weep 'em, touchdown — we want heap more
Fight on, Fight on — 'til you have won
Sons of Wash-ing-ton. Rah!, Rah!, Rah!

Hail to the Redskins!
Hail Vic-tor-y!
Braves on the Warpath!
Fight for old Dixie!


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